Monday, August 29, 2016

How to Make Women Happy: Uninvent Patriarchal Dogma and Male Pretentiousness

Staff Writer, DL Mullan
Women's Issues / Disinformation


An op-ed came to my attention recently about how to make women happy. Unfortunately the piece was full of misinformation, disinformation, and a new form of idiocy. Sometimes men have to stay out of women’s issues in order to be relevant.  

Since I am a woman, I am going to give men a little help in this arena about how to make women happy. My point of view, feminism, is to support women in positive ways that makes their lives and deeds positive for society. My brand of feminism does not hate men, homosexuals, or other women who spew hatred and call it feminism.

Now that we know the rules of engagement, we can proceed.

In order to make a woman in your life happy, a man has to do some very simple acts:

Do not leave your dirty clothes, wet towels on the floor.
Do not blow off your woman when she is talking to you.
Do not act like you have had a worse day than your woman.

First, you married, are living with, or have a woman in your life because you love her. You need her. You cannot face the world without her.

That woman, your co-creator, co-captain, co-pilot in this life should be respected for everything you do not see her do: keep up the house, raise the kids, send all those holiday and birthday cards you sign, do the grocery shopping, manage your home life schedule, call the plumber, pay the bills, and whatever else she does when you are at work. So why with her busy schedule and stress would you come home to either one up her or diminish her responsibilities by emotionally blackmailing her into sympathizing about your traffic jam?

So you can get some alone time. Fifteen minutes but usually an hour of no kids, no phone calls, so you can take a load off. All the while, the woman you are in love with is making dinner for everyone and has not had any alone time, not to mention a break, ever.

As the man of the house it is your duty to set an example for your children on how a family is supposed to run from the father’s point of view. Your sons will grow up to treat their spouses like you treat yours. Your daughters will grow up to look for a man like you to marry. Children see how you ignore your woman when she speaks, how you do not do as you said you were going to do, which leads to your woman “nagging” you.

When a man ignores or rebuffs his woman, that message is received loud and clear by the rest of the family, including your woman. The message is that if you do not respect the mother of your children, why should your children or anyone else respect her either? Then your children perpetuate that cycle when they grow up.

Then there is the health hazard of dirty clothes and wet towels on the floor. These items can also cause slips and falls. Best if these items are hung up or placed in the hamper, whichever is appropriate. That is called respect for your woman, children, and yourself.

The clues here are: if a man is going to act like a child, then a woman is going to treat you like a child.

If a woman has to be placed in a subordinate role of slave by having to mother the man, nag (which is pleading) to get a man to finish or do something she needs done, and clean up after a man, then a woman is going to go elsewhere for respect and love.

A woman therefore becomes unhappy with her lot in life as an unappreciated, unloved slave. A relationship with a woman has to be nurtured, grown. A woman has to know that you are her shoulder and her muscle.

Women do not want to be in a life long relationship with men who are not mature adults. Women do not want football and gaming addicts. Women want someone that is their equal in will power, responsible behavior, and loving actions.  

Women do not want men who hide behind religion to make excuses how a man is this and a man is that. Women do not want men who hide behind the law to make more excuses as to why a man cannot be a responsible person. (I am talking to divorc├ęs here using children as pawns.)

And, for your god’s sake: pull up your damn pants already! No woman of any quality wants a man who shows off his underwear to fellow inmates on the street saying he is available for sex. Gross.  Stop playing a “gangsta,” which is a fictional character, and start being a real emotionally available human being.

So this little informative op-ed is to counter a terrible op-ed about how to make women happy. What the piece from the male writer forgot to include while he was on his religious and conservative soapbox is that the answers are not taking away the birth control pill and washing machine, but to advise men to clean up their acts, act like adults, and just love and respect women in their lives.

Still he dug a bigger hole for men everywhere to climb out of.

The rate of infertility is not because women are confused about mating with a rugged man and looking for a responsible man to cohabitate with. What nonsense. Infertility has to do with our poisoned air, water, and food. Stress is also a huge factor in fertility and stresses of life lead to depression:

“Infertility and depression frequently go together. While you may not be surprised to learn that infertility can lead to depression, you might not know that people who experience depression are more likely to have fertility problems,” states the article: Infertility and Depression 101.

When women are demoralized, demeaned, and debased, men do not realize that the patriarchal confines of society are creating these depressed outcomes. Depression causes a myriad of health related issues, including but not limited to: infertility.

Women usually have little hope for help. A woman cannot go to religious counselors without having their problems ignored but turned around on them. For heaven’s sake women, Eve is at fault and so are you is the recurrent theme and attitude of religion. This negative behavior is lived and relived everyday in a wife, girlfriend, female significant others' experiences at home and at the office. Isn’t it time for society to wake up?

Just like blaming women for being “confused” is blatant disrespect toward the mental faculties and sensibilities of women. That disparaging behavior also signifies the fact that women still have a long way in American society to garner any type of equality.

If men would put down their attitudes, conjured religious texts, and stood up to be counted at home and in society, women could get some stress relief. Instead men are too busy being arm chair quarterbacks making women do all the heavy lifting and criticizing them for making $0.70 on the dollar, we as a human race cannot move forward if we are always taking a step back.

Until men can stop writing pieces for political sites just to be “right” about this, that, or some issue and come to a real understanding about what women live then I do not see society changing for the better.

Men: it is not always necessary to be right about something, which in the case of the aforementioned op-ed is nowhere close to being right, it is necessary to sit down, listen, and correct what needs to be corrected.

If you disagree, then why has divorce skyrocketed in this country in the last few decades? And, don’t tell me it’s because women are confused about the urges of their mating cycle. I think men have become confused about their juvenile cuteness factor.

While you are at it, men, if you would like a harmonious life with women maybe you should also stop polluting the air, water, and food. That would be helpful. Depression and other illnesses are also due to low nutritional rate especially in mineral uptake. A happy Mother Earth would make happy mothers everywhere.

But who am I to contradict a man with my factual and humanizing information? I am just a woman. 

Sources:  Very Well,